I was thinking of how good I had it recently, made it through her period very well looked after.

So why did I go from "on-my-knees" sleepy..... to wide awake and livid.... All in the space of about five seconds? Because when I asked whether she wanted to go to sleep, she said yes. This was reasonable, she'd given out a lot today. It'd been a long day.

Still, here I laid (lay?) seething and thinking about how much of this is just physiological. Maybe there's no reason and no logic behind what I'm going through. I get more effin' pi**ed off that I was wide awake than I was that I wouldn't get an orgasm. Only a few minutes ago, I'd lied in bed talking to her for almost fifteen minutes, tired and ashamed when I thought that if she wasn't gonna want to "do it", then I'd rather skip all the talking and go to sleep. Now I knew the answer, and I didn't know what to do to move on.

Should I talk it all through with her (asking her to give-out a even more)?
I can't ask her for that orgasm, as she's already said she doesn't want sex.

I'm gonna ride this bullshit out. I'm not gonna let the stress and strain of ANY number of sleepless nights stop me from fighting to get through this crap.