Thursday, August 23, 2012

Addiction causes. Triggers

Russell Brand's excellent documentary on addiction says experts in the brain found three interesting reasons for addiction

Stress: some brains react to stress in a way that makes addictive behaviour far more likely even though everyone experiences stress. Some people have a condition where being cut causes them to bleed but it does not clot. They don't use this condition as an excuse to not take responsibility for treating cuts or avoiding cuts, but it's different for them.  They have to live differently.


Dopamine: some have low levels of dopamine. Anyone with this irregularity will find it hard to avoid something that triggers or increases this vital natural chemical that is found in all our brains, naturally. Without enough dopamine we find it hard to get out of bed,we are low and are very susceptible to temptation of things that will make us feel better.

Impulsivity:  people who suffered from problems with addiction to strong drugs were all found to be highly impuslive. Everyone has temptations and desires that aren't healthy.  Those who are particularly impulsive are at higher risk of acting on those desires.  I might say, "No" 99 times, but sometimes I find myself on the other side of "yes" before I realise what I've done.  My impulsiveness can work for me as well.  Sometimes I get up and go for a run before I have a chance to think about how much I don't want to exercise.  I once threw away my entire stash of pot in a rightly motivated impulse to clean up and fly right!

If you struggle with addicition (porn, etc.) you might need to take responsibility for your moods, learn to change the ways you cope with stress, and manage your impulses much tighter than most.  Freedom is possible, it's up to us to take responsibility then, and only then, do I believe God will step in and give us a miracle.

She's strong, I'm appauled

Read an excellent book Boundaries. She's reading it now & it's helping her to see that her feelings and wants are important too.

All that good stuff yet I'm livid that she said she didn't want to do it last mint. Why not? Because she's free and it's not a burden. She was annoyed at me and didn't feel like it. It had only been two nights since we did it. But I'm appalled & powerfully driven to challenge or plead or any other word that means convince or control her . It's like I can't let go & get past her saying no & I think she owes it to me. I can't think about anything else and don't want anything except to "put right" what seems so wrong. I have been changing my "fuck. Fuck! Fuck!" expressions and cries to "Die! Die die" but the newness has worn off & it doesn't seem so useful anymore.