Sex Idol

So she was pretty pissed off all of yesterday, which I only really found out when we were lying in bed together--late. Somehow when that's the situation I automatically switch from demading selfish mode to selfless and caring mode. Then I rolled over and went to sleep without much hassle.

But after a strong memory of several days when I didn't "get any" recently, I'm pissed about tonight being a late night out for her. That's two in a row. Damnit! It goes through my head the idea of me saying to folks that I need to be home early and explaining that's the only way I can get sex. Just as ridiculous is for her to not go out or not stay out so late so we can not miss "doing it". Ridiculous. That's one sign of an addict--when the addiction squeezes out other parts of life. Idolising sex is when it's too important, takes over instead of a part of a healthy mix of life.

Usually when we miss a day or two, I start getting agitated. In order for our relationship to carry-on happily I need to relax and stay connected--not withdraw or pout. Should I go around chanting and reminding myself:

"Sex is not my right"

"No One Does it Daily"