Okay, every time I want it & don't get it, I'm really touchy about her walking around naked, bending over (like when she blow-dries her hair). The rubbish going through my mind is, "How appauling that she's doing this AND it means nothing. How unbelievable that she's NOT meaning, "Come on, I want you". As if it's torture on two counts... 1) she's not interested sexually. 2) she's rubbing my face in the fact that some of my strongest sexual images aren't sexual in real life. I've conditioned myself to see a "her" bent over and get turned on and cum. I DEEPLY associate the naked female form with sexual arousal. WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!!
So, when I hear the shower running and think, "She's naked, but not the least be available" I need to think a little logically. When she bends over, but is not thinking of me or sex... I need to think about it sensibly. Every time is not a sexual signal. But, hey.. There are sexual signals. Once or twice a month all the planets line up just right... We're "in sync" and she really does want me. Isn't the real thing better than just an orgasm mechanically following the sight of her rear or nakedness?
So, yeah, it hurts that it's less often that you want. It sucks that these bogus associations exist. Gotta move on though. This crap is destructive & you don't want to loose the very very good stuff that you've got.
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