Momentum feels like going downhill

Out for a run a few times lately I've enjoyed His small still voice.  It's been great to enjoy my 80's rock and break into thankfulness and commune with Him too.  No guilt or negatives about "how much, how long, how devout"  Just enjoying Him.

Driving the other night I had a thought, and a related meta-thought that was like, "That's negative, that's not very Christlike".  Then I realized that I spend energy wishing I was more whole, more selfless, more together.  Maybe covering it up or pretending I'm better.  Does this drop on my dark damp pile of shame?

What if I could say, "yeah, that's true about me now.  I have that weakness or fault. But God loves me and it's ok.  Wouldn't that be the most mature, humble and godly attitude and approach?  Honesty, what a radical concept!